Leap of Faith

[ninjabear]

I did wonder how you came up such a screen name.

Just the same I thank you, Bugger, for being the Esmerelda to my Quasimodo.

[fringey]

iswallowedabug wrote: "We will grieve not, rather find strength in what remains behind;
in the primal sympathy which having been must ever be."
--Wordsworth, "Intimations of Immortality"

ninjabear wrote: Still waiting for that magic spell; but I would not dream of spoiling anyone's fun while I wait.

The problem isn't that there is no spell, the problem is that for it
to work, you'd have to believe it will work. Call it a catch-22, call it a
non-falsifiable theory, call it what you will.

I could give you a set of things to do and say, and when you've
done and said them, it won't have worked if you started out
believing that it wouldn't. (And if you do believe that it will work,
doing and saying those things is only a formality.)

It doesn't matter when the spell finds its way to you, it's a matter of
you being ready for the spell.

ninjabear wrote: Bugger, the question is what would you endure for someone else?

I would think you know me well enough by now to know that the
real question is not "what would I endure," but "what wouldn't I
endure for someone else?"

Very astute, Ms. Bug. You are so right about magic not woring if you don't believe in it. You obviously have your head in the right place.

As to the question about enduring whatever it takes, I am more than willing to go to some pretty far places to make a partner happy. However, I think that the right person would know where to draw a line and wouldn't make you endure. For instance, an ex of mine, knowing my tastes in music, asked me what would happen if she asked me to go to a Garth Brooks concert with her. I told her, I would be happy to go to the show with her if it made her happy, even if I didn't really enjoy it. However, if she had asked me to go to a P Diddy or Eminem concert, I would have to draw a line and say, " I know youmight enjoy it, but I would really hate it. So, would that not lessen your enjoyment knowing I really didn't want to be there?" On the converse, what if I asked her to go to a concert I liked, but she probably wouldn't enjoy? Would it be wrong of me to insist she go? I think so. It is all a questiof of give and take. Just my POV.

Patrick
a.k.a. Fringey, The Fringe Element
"A life lived without passion is a life not lived."

[fringey]

ninjabear wrote: I like you Fringey, but that's not the kind of magic I meant.
I went with "Evil Vampire Willow" right before "good little church girl" Pam.
I couldn't sit through an episode of Buffy, even with "Evil Willow" blowing in my ear with the promise of more if I watched the whole thing (as I think of it, she still owes me for making me watch 13Ghosts...oh well).
I call it "The Baywatch Effect"; something you should be really into, that just rankles you instead.
Still waiting for that magic spell; but I would not dream of spoiling anyone's fun while I wait.
Bugger, the question is what would you endure for someone else?

My question for you NB, is are you sure you are ready for another relationship? You can take everythign I say with a grain of salt because I am not relationship expert. However, from what I have seen from your posts, you seem to be still too tied up in this thing with Pam to be able to truly give yourself to someone totally. There is still a lot of anger, resentment, and, yes, love for her in your posts. I honestly feel that you could end up in a worse relationship, or worse yet, end up hurting some else because you haven't completey let go. You would probably

a.) Constantly be looking for Pam in the other person, in both the good and bad ways.

b.) Too cynical about being so badly burned the last time to honestly believe the relationship could work, which would surely doom it.

As I said, this is just my own personal feeling and observations, and I am not saying these things to torque your jaw out of joint or hurt you. I have just been reading a lot of posts over the last couple of months and you seem to seesaw pretty heavily in your moods. Having both been there, and done that, I can definitely see signs in you that I have been through myself.

Patrick
a.k.a. Fringey, The Fringe Element
"A life lived without passion is a life not lived."

[ninjabear]

Quote: iswallowedabug wrote"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened. Seuss

Seuss is dead,
dead I said,
down in the ground with dirt on his head.

[lucifer666 (deleted)]

Thats blasphemous talk Ninjabear

[shadownymph_PREV (deleted)]

ninjabear wrote: I can see that spell I requested is not forthcoming...eh, just as well.
What I really need is a witchy little wench to work some magic on my wand---now that always does the trick.

Silliness aside, I think I should be grateful for everything I have, and all I've had, because it's probably all I'm gonna get.

NinjaBear... Go here: (removed)
It does not erase the memory, nothing short of a psychotic break or a blow to the head will do that

It's a good ritual but you use a willow wand

[iswallowedabug (deleted)]

ninjabear wrote: Seuss is dead,
dead I said
down in the ground with dirt on his head.

"Some things are better left unspoken,
Some things are better left undone.
Maybe better to be broken,
Maybe richer to have none."
- from the song "I'll Wait" by R. Gerson

[ninjabear]

Broken down old bears like me don't get many opportunities for romance as it is; this was almost certainly my last trip to the buffet.
Now I starve, and you want me to be happy about it---just as well, because there's more to this story.

[ninjabear]

The other part of this whole ordeal, the one that gnaws at me constantly, is my mistreatment by Pam's church pastor.
All I did was reach out for emotional counsel and spiritual guidance; but I was treated like a criminal instead.
A Salvation Army officer is a clergyperson, an ordained member of their church, duty bound to help; this captain deliberately misidentified me to the police as a stalker, for what reason I do not know.
As a result, a city cop came bounding out of his jurisdiction so desperate to be a hero he should've been wearing a cape and tights, but I hold him less responsible.
Although the police officer ordered me to stay away from a church, I admit he was acting on what he considered valid information from a reliable source...which only makes it worse.
None has been forthcoming, but I deserve an apology.

[twincarb]

All i can say is to quote mel brooks LIFE SUCKS.
But we keep banging our heads against the unfeeling wall that is life, hoping against all reason that the wall will collaspe, or to put it a different way" If you see a light at the end of the tunnel it's probably a photon torpedo!!!!"

[iswallowedabug (deleted)]

ninjabear wrote: Broken down old bears like me don't get many opportunities for romance as it is; this was almost certainly my last trip to the buffet.
Now I starve, and you want me to be happy about it---




I am reminded of the age old adage "If you swallow a live frog in the
morning, nothing worse can happen to EITHER of you all day."

Which also makes me think of the cartoon with the stork or heron
swallowing a frog, but the frog has its hands around the stork's
neck and is strangling it. The caption reads "Don't ever give up."

[ninjabear]

About an hour ago, someone I had not seen in 15 years approached me at the Halloween store. Joe called me by name, then told me he remembers me for stealing a tape I shot of a club function, and that he's never forgotten it.
We were both members of a local Trek fan club. I was censured without due process and (I believe) unjustly, so I quit. I took with me the only copy of the video I shot with my own camera, on my own tape, with no compensation offered; I stole nothing.
Perhaps it gave Joe some catharsis, pointing at me and calling me a thief then running off without giving me a chance to say much of anything. I hadn't thought about him in over ten years...but I had pause to consider something else.
I deserve an apology from that Salvation Army Captain. The police were really here, because she revealed confidential communications to law enforcement---you're supposed to be able to trust a clergyperson with anything, but now I know better.
I just don't want to be like Joe; bearing a grudge over a small, imagined slight the rest of my life...hell, I'm not sure what to think anymore.

[kiraofborg_PREV (deleted)]

Geesh,

If all these different people are saying you have problems then maybe you do. I am sure they and the police are out to conspire to get you. I have had experience with this and you know what I mean. What is the real issue? A lonely man types about his pain and appears the victim for sympathy. The best way to get over something is to get over it. I always thought ninja's had a stronger constitution than that. If I thought it were real then I would truly feel for you. You know how bad my past was and yet I have found true love on this site. You could do to take a lesson from him about how to turn sadness into pure happiness and bliss. Regardless of how great my life is and what I hope is going to be my husband, good luck with everything.

[ezd]

iswallowedabug wrote: ninjabear wrote: Broken down old bears like me don't get many opportunities for romance as it is; this was almost certainly my last trip to the buffet.
Now I starve, and you want me to be happy about it---




I am reminded of the age old adage "If you swallow a live frog in the
morning, nothing worse can happen to EITHER of you all day."

Which also makes me think of the cartoon with the stork or heron
swallowing a frog, but the frog has its hands around the stork's
neck and is strangling it. The caption reads "Don't ever give up."





"If" you swallow a live frog in the morning? Whole? Where on earth did you hear that old age adage?! :shock:

[ninjabear]

If you swallow a live frog...hmmm, sounds like something Clemens would say, but I don't know that for a fact.
Bugs, tofu and frogs---anything you won't swallow, Bugger?